by Chelsea Springli 
Congratulations on tying the knot! Marriage brings together two people, and two very different financial backgrounds. As newlyweds , learning how to navigate your differences with honesty and intention can help you create a strong financial future. When you’re ready to talk about budgeting with a spouse, Alltru is ready with the answers. Here are a few newlywed budgeting tips.
Start the Conversation Before the Wedding
Hopefully, you’ve had some serious conversations about money long before your wedding day. Starting these conversions before you tie the knot will help you understand your spouse’s sense or normal. According to Psychology Today, many people pick up habits or a way of living based on how they grew up, since that’s what’s comfortable to them, even if it’s unconscious. This is true for chores, dieting, and even money.
With conscious effort, you can take what you like and change what you didn’t like to create a lifestyle that works for you and your spouse. Maybe you’re used to eating out twice a week but your spouse is more frugal with meal planning. Your spouse might prefer to hire someone to make repairs to cars but you prefer to do the work yourself. Starting these conversions before you get married will help you two prioritize what aspects of your money you need to spend ample time tackling versus what will be easier to manage.
Combine Your Finances
Deciding whether or not to combine finances in marriage is a personal decision. If you choose to do so, there are several ways to merge your money. However, even if you and your new spouse decide to keep individual accounts, it makes sense to have one shared account for recurring shared household expenses such as your mortgage or rent, utilities, and shared vehicle payments. This way, you each can set up recurring deposits to this account and then set up automatic recurring payments for your bills from this account.
Regardless of your decision, be flexible. As with most aspects of budgeting, you newlyweds will learn which specific money management approaches work best for your marriage over time. It will likely come with some trial and error. Even though you may try a few different ways of combining finances and responsibility for paying your bills, the key to making any method successful is teamwork.
Know Your Priorities
Once you determine how you want to combine your finances, you can discuss your priorities with your money, whether they’re separate or combined. Your priorities should be determined by not only how you’re combining finances once your next paycheck comes but even based on how much money you both currently have.
For example, your 12-year-old car could slowly become too expensive to keep working, so you need to save. You’ll likely make saving for a down payment a priority, while your spouse may prioritize maxing out his Roth IRA this year. On the other hand, if you completely combine your finances, you can both work to save for a car down payment together, and likely meet your goal faster. Then, you can adjust your retirement contributions. Talk about your priorities so you can stay aligned to where you want to go in life together, even if you’re funding your own path to get there.
I come from a finance background, but that doesn’t mean that I’m perfect at budgeting. I understand the importance of saving for retirement, paying off debt, and having an emergency fund, but this was the first time that my husband had to set financial priorities. We started with the basics: saving for retirement, the double-edged sword of needing debt, but keeping it in check and building up an emergency savings account.
Commit to Budgeting
Budgeting takes time, effort, and a lot of willpower. Your budget will be largely influenced by how you combine money and your individual or shared priorities. Talk with your spouse, make a plan, put it in writing, and make it happen. That way, you know exactly what you need to contribute to your household fund and how much you can afford to save or spend.
Following a budget takes teamwork. It may come easy to your spouse to follow a budget but more difficult for you. If you both commit to following the budget, your finances are less likely to cause strain in your relationship. Regularly reviewing your spending together will help you both see your progress and know what adjustments to make. If you make saving and investing a habit, it will be easier to live without the money you’re setting aside, and chances are you won’t even miss it after a couple of months.
For Better or For Worse
You’ve already made the commitment to each other, now commit to building a strong financial future together. Even if you realize that you didn’t discuss finances enough while you were dating or engaged, you can still start the conversation now and plan a happy and financially sound life.
